dʒə
–noun
1. a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one's life, to one's home or homeland, or to one's family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time: a nostalgia for his college days.
2. something that elicits or displays nostalgia.
With as stressed as I am lately with life bombarding me with things I wish I didn't have to deal with, I heard a song this morning that transported me back to 1995. Now, 1995 was a pleasantly insane year filled with music, colors, lights and motions. It was filled with endless dancing and love for new found friends (which could be made every night) and a carefree attitude that only a 19 year old could have with no true responsibilities or worries. It was freedom at it's best. This is what it looked like for me -
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| That's me with the sunglasses and my infamous Snoopy backpack. |
I was beginning to find myself and realize who I was. Regardless of the fact that it took massive amounts of hallucinogenics and MDMA. It was too much fun for simple words. The entire world was within reach and all I had to do was dance towards it. The dance floor in The Edge, Paragon, Warsaw, Diamante's, etc, etc was where I found divine enlightenment. It's where I found the words to express what it was I was seeing. It was where I could be in the here and now and not worry about what just happened 5 minutes ago or worry about what hadn't even happened yet. It was where I felt love. Even as the years went by, the dance floor was the only place that I felt like me and could feel free.
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| http://www.playlist.com/playlist/additem/153756433 Go listen to this song! |
I've come to figure out that I don't dance much anymore these days. Between adding years onto my age, 2 daughters that I raise by myself, food to be cooked, dishes to be washed, laundry to be done, floors to be mopped, work to get to, driving around half of Miami on a daily basis, I long for a moment of that feeling again. I can put on Rabbit in the Moon's "Out of Body Experience" and I will literally feel the chills go up my spine and a feeling of elation take over. My heart rides a roller coaster to that song. I just want it for one night without the drug combinations. It was never about the drugs. It was the music. I can listen to some songs and pick apart the complicated beats and melodies and find that bass line that I can groove to. I can go on private get away's in the comfort of my car by throwing the speakers on full blast. I need a night out of no worries and only dancing. Will I get? Who knows but I can always hope.
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| "You have to hear this song. It will change your life." |
