I drive a 1994 Ford Tempo which drives surprisingly well, has cold A/C, a working radio and has less than 80,000 miles. I really can't complain because, hey, at least I have a car and it doesn't look as if it's falling apart. But, because it's a basic car, I only have radio which means my musical fix gets chopped up in the mornings by radio djs talking the world of garbage. I admit, some of it is entertaining and funny, but other times I'm forced to constantly change channels for 15 minutes straight before I find actual music and not talking. This particular morning, a female dj on a popular Miami radio station admits that she would love to be called a "baby mama". She finds it hot. The moments those words came out of her mouth, I felt my face flush and my blood begin to boil. Here's why:
According to www.urbandictionary.com, this is the first 6 definitions of the meaning of "baby mama" -
1. The mother of your child(ren), whom you did not marry and with whom you are not currently involved.
2. A term used to define an unmarried young woman (but can be a woman of any age) who has had a child. As mentioned before in another definition, most of the time it is used for when it was simply a sexual relationship, compared to ex-wife or girlfriend. Usually this has a negative connotation, a lot of baby mamas are seen as desperate, gold digging, emotionally starved, shady women who had a baby out of spite or to keep a man. Sometimes they may act like this because of missed child support payments, unfulfilled promises by the father, or convenient sex by the father. Either or both may exist in any situation.
3. Basically a woman you had a child or children with who you didnt marry and or no longer involved with.Usually associated with hoodrats and trailer park bitches.
4. 1.Who to make the check out to.
2.The mother of your children.
3.A source of endless emotional pain and/or headaches
5. A woman who has a child out of wedlock with a man. She may or may not be in a relationship with the man, but most of the time, she's not. She may think she has some sort of postion or leverage in the man's life, just because she had a child with the man, but all she is, is a baby mama, nothing else. Some baby mamas use the child as a pawn or weapon to "get what they want" from the child's father, IE: money, food, sex, etc. If the man is in a realtionship with a woman who has no children, the baby mama may become jealous and cause baby mama drama. A stereotype associated with baby mama's is they are poor, lazy bitches who trapped the man into getting her pregnant or tricked him by saying she was on the pill, thinking the man would pay her way in life just because she has a child with him. Not all baby mama's are like that. The majority of them just act like they can control the man just because they had a seed with them, and make it difficult for the man and threaten to take the child away or sue for more child support if the baby mama doesn't get her way.
6. a term used for females who had a baby by a guy that does not claim them, hence, THEY ARE NOT TOGETHER. a lot of girls, namely wiggers/wigger bitches think it's cute to be a dude baby mama and proudly brag about it and try to attach "wifey" along to the title. this is a key sign of a fake bitch who aint from the ghetto but just tryna be down usin the word completely out of context. once you're a baby mama, THAT'S IT. you're nothing more. it's not a compliment. yall aint special. or else you wouldn't be referred to as a baby mama. havin a dude baby don't mean you have some sort of significance in his life. and him referring to you as his baby mama is just his way of sayin he don't love you and will dread the next 18 years and regrets that night 9 months ago.
Mind you, there were over 20 more definitions after these initial 6 but they all boiled down to the same thing. I abhor that term. I find it disgustingly derogatory. I don't find it endearing. It is not something that is said in a positive manner. It makes you appear to be trashy. I work hard as hell to take care of my girls by myself. I do not sit on my ass all day long bitching about how I'm waiting all the time on child support and constantly complaining about my girls' fathers. Yes, they have 2 different fathers. Yes, if it wasn't for Medicaid, they wouldn't have health insurance. But I work and have always worked. I have never caused drama in either father's life. I do not expect for someone to swoop down and sweep me off my feet to take care of me. I am realist. I do it myself. Why on Earth would any self-respecting woman want to be called a "baby mama"?!? You are a mother of a child. Do not stand to be called anything less if you want to be treated with dignified respect. Honestly, the ignorance of some people make me wonder why they were given the ability to speak.
