I'm seriously tired of all these political news articles on cutting funding for all these programs that I happen to need and listening to these crazy GOP candidates/senate/congress people who swear they're God-fearing telling me that more is going to be taken from my paycheck and more is going to be taken away from my kids in form of education cuts, food program cuts, cuts for everything! I have no shame in saying, yes, I receive money every month for food. It's not much (less than $200 for 3 people) but it helps tremendously. I live paycheck to paycheck like most Americans and I still don't have enough money at the end of the week for almost anything. I've fallen behind on rent and every day I wake up wondering if this is going to be the day I won't have a place to live. How am I suppose to be a decent mother if I can't even give my girls a place to live? My girls have health insurance but I apparently make too much to qualify for health care so I can't get the root canal I've needed for almost 2 years, can't see a doctor about the pinched nerve in my shoulder and back that causes me pain on a daily basis no matter how much Tylenol or Aleve I take, can't seek out a doctor about the nagging depression I had after my daughter was born and her father passed away, can't get any antibiotics when I get a massive sinus infection and can barely breathe. My car died on me months ago and it would have cost more to fix it than what I paid for it so I junked the car to help pay for bills that I've still haven't caught up with. I take the bus every morning at 6 AM to drop off my girls at the day care so one can stay and the other get picked up for school. I then ride the bus/metrorail/bus another 1 1/2 one way to get to work do have to do it again in 5 hours (because I can't work full time since I don't have anyone else to pick up my kids after the day care/after school program closes). I don't get home with them until after 9:30 to put the baby to sleep, make sure my eldest has everything done and ready for the following day, make sure she sleeps, try to clean up a bit , get my things together for the next day and collapse into bed for (if I'm lucky) 6 hours of sleep. When I spoke to my case worker about applying for a bus pass, I was told funding for that was cut and if I'm working, I can't apply for one for me or my daughter. If I didn't work and went to school full time, I could get one and more food stamps but no help to have a place to live because the state of Florida only allots $260 a month in cash assistance. What is $260 a month suppose to do? Meanwhile, every person who holds some sort of seat on a government board here in Miami (since it's all about who you know,not what you can actually do) got raises again and make over $100,000 a year minimum. And don't even get me started on the freaking MDT. The buses never run on time. If they break down (which they do often), there are never any replacement buses so people can get to work or home on time. You're basically left standing around with your thumb up your ass wondering what happened since when you call the customer service line (305-770-3131), 9 out of 10 times, you happen upon total incompetence. Everything I get goes to my girls. The last time I even bought myself anything was a $3 shirt from Walmart because I happen to need new clothes for work. And that was over a month ago. What I would give to be able to buy myself a new pair of jeans and a new pair of shoes I can wear to work. I can manage with the sneakers I've had for the last 5 years. They really aren't in bad shape. I would love to go get a hair cut and maybe color my hair myself but the thought of spending the $20 in Supercuts and then another $10 for color at Walmart makes me think twice because that money could be going into something else. A mani/pedi? Ha! Never gonna happen. As much as I would love to be in a relationship, who am I kidding? What guy wants to deal with all of this? The last date I went on was with a guy who is now back with his ex-girlfriend because she turned up pregnant. My luck just goes all around, doesn't it? I would love to be able to take a day off and just spend it with my girls without having to worry what my check is going to look like at the end of the week. I don't have anyone to turn to. I don't have any place to go. What am I suppose to do? Worry myself sick into a hospital? Of course not. I can't afford to.
